ciao roma.

Come sta? Io sto cosi cosi. I'm not sure how I feel about you right now. I leave in less than two weeks and everyone keeps asking me if I'm excited. Honestly, I have no idea. It doesn't feel real. I filled out the application back in November and have been saving to pay for it for years. It doesn't feel like it is happening already. I don't know if I am ready. Leaving to be there means this is my last summer before I enter the "real world." It means senior years starts soon and I have a lot of decisions to make. It means I am closer to having to basically start over in my last year of college. It means too many things are approaching way too fast.

I want to enjoy my time with you, I want to really learn your language and culture. I want to meet good people so that I don't feel alone in a foreign country. I want to come back more cultured and even more appreciative of the world around me. I want to be able to sleep on the plane. I want to eat gelato and real Italian pizza. I want to find my place of tranquility within your city limits. I want to take you all in and be open to new things and new possibilities. Maybe you will even help me find clarity, since the cloud I am in does not seem to want to go away. Maybe I should try harder to find that clarity within myself, but I want you to help me find it. For the first time I will not have my friends and family at my fingertips. I cannot go on my blackberry and be a text away from talking to someone, or look at facebook to see what is going on with everyone. I have to solve my problems by myself and figure things out completely on my own. It is my life, right? I should be able to do that much at 21 years old.

I want you to help me, but I also want you to be an experience I will never forget and the things I learn from you will be with me forever.

Lo vedero presto Roma! Spero che sia pronto.